I'm not dead (third time)

Of course I'm not dead.

Not just yet, of course.

It seems life has become a little complicated, or my life is too tiring it makes me go to bed almost directly, and the times I've been trying to sleep well, well, I just try to profit thereof.

One friend of mine was remembering old times and was asking me what do I remember from our childhood dreaming of other cities, other faces, other customs. And there we were, sitting down at the shadow of a tree, or at the schoolyard thinking on leaving when we were able to do so, thinking our life was going to start then.

Somebody said, "Life is what happens while you're busy making other plans". Word.

As soon as I get my contents solid, I'll post. I hope it will be soon, because it looks like I'm abandoning my xanga, which is not true.

Cheers, dear casual reader.

Joey.

After a time

Yet one more snippet from the non-existent story Eriko & Jan

Epilogue

Jan took a sip of coffee. Tried as he might, was still unable to assimilate the words he just heard minutes ago. Walking around like a lion in a cage proved to be as desperating as staying on the couch recycling the words he heard over the telephone.

Snorting as if he was a horse, left for the street. Once he was on the sidewalk, he returned, by sheer uneasiness, and went down the parked car. Still feeling the uneasiness boil on his blood, decided it would be better to sit down behind the wheel. No driving, just stay behind the wheel and imagine he's on one of those long dry roads going in and out of Vegas... amidst the tumbleweeds and the occasional sand storm. That Interstate 15 was pretty fitting for what he was needing at this time. All of a sudden, the car felt like it was moving on the narrow, four-lane road. The reddish golden sands watching from afar, while he was practically flying on his beaten-up RX-7.

Involuntarily, Jan's hand reached for the pocket and produced a key chain. Starting up the engine, the car headed out and merged with the street traffic. Out there in the streets, it felt too crowded for Jan, so he decided to head for an open road, finally. Upon following randomly the directions on several sign posts indicating destinations, he took one, based only on the only fact that it seemed a fair drive, and he needed desperately soak his head on fresh air to see if it would help him to settle the uneasiness and the rest of those feelings circling around his head.

While the houses alongside the road were descending in quantity and frequency, Jan's head was increasingly becoming clearer. After all, he only needed to acknowledge all what he just listened. All of a sudden, while turning the radio dial, he started revisiting all those words Eriko had told him:

- "So, what have you been up to?" - Heard himself after much fidgeting with the keyboard and listen the telephone signal it was ringing on the receiving end.
- "Not much really, I'm just about to take on clay modeling as a form of occupational therapy" - Eriko's voice was relaxed.
- "Is that to say you're not really doing much on the job?" - inquired a puzzled Jan, who always thought her job schedule was way too demanding even at "slow times", as Mr. Dizon would say about the times where Eriko and her team weren't producing another video, recording, or having a string of presentations. 
- "Well, then. It sounds like it's coming from that 'Ghost' movie with that Swayze guy. Good thing you're not into girls." - he pointed.
- "What makes you think my teacher is a girl? I never said anything like that!" - Eriko's voice raised in a mix of puzzled questioning and amazement.
For a brief, awkward pause, Jan could not articulate a word. At the same time, while listening Eriko's words, felt how his feelings were boiling violently, like magnesium on water.
- "Actually, the teacher is a guy... and it's nice to me, too." - She paused for a second, and then proceeded to lay the whole game on the table: "To be honest, I'm going out with him." - She completed, as bluntly as the Ice Pick that killed Trotsky. Jan's legs were failing on him. His chest felt like it had a furnace inside.
Jan just barely could articulate words, but managed to show he wasn't fazed by what Eriko was telling him. Other thing would have been to see his face, which was lacking all of the colors of the world and turned into a bluish kind of pale. The creepy type, that was.

Still without realizing the effect of her words, Eriko continued elaborating on her new relationship.

- "I was too busy meeting his family and such, but since I had time away from the job, and we're on a slow time... Mr. Dizon has told me not to rush, really. So there I was talking to him, then we started going over to lunch and stuff, then... you should meet him, he's a cute guy." -

Jan felt he needed an air blower shoved into his throat, but even so, he wasn't about letting her know he was in a near-critical psychotic reaction. - "Is that so?" - muttered to the mouthpiece.

- "Well it all has been too fast! He even has proposed me! Can you believe it?" - While Eriko was giggling about her own comment, Jan's thinking was obscured from the dizzyness produced by the word "propose". His answer was barely listeneable: "You amaze me. I thought you weren't into marrying now".
- "As a matter of fact, I wasn't considering it, but just because I've never been proposed before!, you know?" - She retorted in a gamely manner, hinting Jan could have take that chance before. Jan took the hint immediately, but as other lost chances, it came on the wrong time. Not answering was the only sane thing he could think of at the time. He needed to know if it wasn't a seriously bad joke, therefore he applied himself on the conversation, although feeling worse by knowing the truth was the most likely scenario.
- "So now you tell me you're interested on marrying this guy?. Don't you think it's too soon?" - Jan wanted to last the conversation a little longer, so he could gather as much information bits as he could, but his condition was worsening by the minute he was listening Eriko say everything related to seriously become unreachable.
- "I think so, but Who knows, anyway? I still need to adapt, because it all has happened too fast. All his family is so lovely, and I'm pretty sure everyone will like him. He's got this kindness to him... I know once you meet him, you both will be great pals", she elaborated on the possibility of both men becoming good friends, but Jan wasn't as excited as Eriko was.
- "You must know, once you get married, you won't be able to be in touch with your friends as before the wedding. As soon as you say yes, you're no longer a free woman, but a married lady, and your first obligation will be stay inside the marriage circle, close to your husband. So the others, are staying outside, not too close. Maybe to visit from time to time, but won't be able to go out with you as it used to. I think every society and every culture has established it about the same."

Jan's words sounded stern.

- "And I wouldn't want to scare you, but what if you find something you actually don't like about him and then you have to stick with it because, you know, it happens?. And what if he wants kids immediately and you don't?, or else? Just think it over pretty well"
A brooding silence invaded the telephone line for a few seconds. Jan's words would have been said in such a sotto voce, but the effect was as if they were yelled out with a megaphone at full, stuck to his mouth. If he wasn't jealous, Eriko could not grasp what was his problem.

- "My, Jan. You sound incredibly mad about this. Are you okay with it? Seriously, man." Eriko's voice sounded midway between concerned by Jan's matter-of-fact jealously and shocked by the strange reaction. - "Are you jealous, Jan?" - She inquired. If Jan could have seen Eriko's slanting eyes, he would have felt intimidated by her penetrating sight. But this was the telephone. He could thank Graham Bell for sparing him by not including video on the device.
- "I mean, Seriously already" - Eriko's voice sounded demanding, now. - "Tell me the truth!" Jan realized his anger covering was feeble at the least. He could not possibly let her know he was so hurt, because he didn't want to acknowledge it from the start. Rephrasing could save him from too much explaining, but it seemed cumbersome, after the last sentences. He felt like he was more than neck-high on water. But there was a light on the end of the tunnel, anyways.

- "If I say this things to you is because I still feel responsible for your wellbeing, after all this time. Telling me I'm jealous is such a nonsense." - He felt he gained a little ground now, and felt confident to be a little more bold to elaborate:
- "I still think it's my duty to raise all these issues to you, so you can evaluate your probable hit and misses. Don't get me wrong. Remember it was the thing I used to do all of the time". - Jan felt he was about to hear a "you have a point" right there. He decided to charge full-throttle and take his words a notch higher.
- "Now, for the record. I'm truly glad you found someone to have a relationship with. Seriously. You are a good person and deserve a good relationship. Not like you haven't had one, but I guess we all want one, too." - All of a sudden, Jan's Adam's apple felt like a huge knot which made him hard to swallow. - "Just don't assume all of the guys are good, you're such an innocent person, anyone may want to take advantage of you. Just don't let them do. That new guy must behave, otherwise I'm not forgiving him ever". All of a sudden, Eriko's anger vanished, turning into amazement. She never expected him to tell her those words one more time.
- "And don't tell me I'm not serious, because I am. If he hurts you, I won't forgive him. Ever." - Eriko was clutching the curled cable between her fingers. A long pause made the air so thick, she had a hard time breathing. Jan's words became progressively soft.
- "And if he ever leaves you alone, I'll be here waiting for you. Okay?"

After the last few words, Eriko heard a sudden smack noise on her telephone and it went immediately dead. She repeatedly flicked the line switch to make sure it wasn't an accident, but it all was in vain.

Jan hung up.

Eriko dialed frantically once again, but the telephone sounded busy. Probably Jan left the unit unhanged, so it won't receive any calls. After a while trying, but to no avail, Eriko abandoned her efforts and limped across the floor in her Fair Oaks apartment, falling over her big, puffy yellow couch. She lifted her head, and proceeded to the window in the west side of the Hillside Manor. She looked at the distance, intently. Then paused for a cue coming from nowhere. All she could hear was the wind, and all she saw was an azalea leaf crossing the window, and falling onto her hands.

Meantime, back in Abiko, Jan was sitting on a chair, looking blankly at the ceiling. After a while, he rolled his eyes onto the telephone mouthpiece, laying on the table, out of her cradle. He found himself fidgeting with his tie. Stood up, and went for some fresh air at his window.
When he finally opened the windows, a rain of Azalea flowers came into his appartment, smothering him in leaves. For a moment, all those flower petals flooating onto him made him feel like all his pains were in the past, aloof his sufferings are in the past.

Heading for the door, he took his keychain. It seemed a good time to take a walk outside.

THE END.

©2009 Joey Kaye

The Great Rock'n'Roll Swindle! (part 2)

    Currently listening: 3 Doors Down - Kryptonite   

It has been a merry ole time to do this job. Since I got the off-vocal version of this song, I wanted to try it. If psychedelia was not enough to sing it, there was the reverse recording effect, plus the whole thing about who made the first video clips for what we knew as MTV since the 80's.

I've tried to strike the voice sound balance to actually match the dull sound of the base recording. I'm assuming the recording was done in then-pristine 4 track recorders, but since they always layered something or else, it's probably true they had transferred the music at least 2 times before recording the main voice. As you can see, I haven't consulted its Wiki to check any possible facts and I'm just saying by analyzing the sound file as it is. The drums sound squashed, and the voices sound one generation over the instruments, therefore my guess of a 2nd generation recording. Of course, if you take this recording to yet another four-track to print vocals, the final recording would end up being main voice a second generation, while the harmony vocals third, and the instruments fourth. Then, it's no wonder why they had to take it to a mastering engineer (besides doing the ungrateful job of producing a master print mold in a lathe). The final recording must have been has dull as my shoes.

I guess I did a pretty decent job. The voice strikes the sound of the base recording pretty close (modern recording techniques would render the recording foul due to an excess of fidelity). The second match was the voice effect itself . To get that sound you have to have the signal go through a slight delay, without any feedback, and pan hard left and right each the direct signal and the delayed one. Key tip: the time delay has to be 17 milliseconds exactly. Why? that's the technical secret of the "artificial double tracking" they used back on the day when John would be bothered about tracking a second vocal to create a more uniform vocal take. As a trivia tip, an accident on the tape transport of that high-speed echo machine would lead to discover the "flanger" effect.

The only effect I could not achieve because I remembered up when writing this: Tape saturation. It would give it the final touch on the voice quality. If you listen in mono, you can hear the voice blend in just right. Try it if available, dear casual reader.

Finally, my voice sounds as nasal as I could. This is best imitated by Oasis singer Noel Gallagher. I tried to sing a uniform nasal falsetto voice, but as you can see, it sounds kind of fake, not like John's which tends to sound powerful.

The story behind this song is, I wanted to play around with a software called Sound Trax which comes included in the Nero suite for burning and backup. The idea behind all these utilities are to give you the ability to create the kind of content the way you really want, and not just another burning software alone. So, there it is a recoding utility, the audio cleaning tool (sometimes referred as audio doctoring tool), the multi-track and surround mix recording utility, the audio sequencing and mixing utility, and the DVD/SVCD/CD front-end creation utility besides the label maker.

Sound Trax reminded me of Cool Edit Pro and my very own shenanigans about recording with a software with several shortcomings. Look at Sound Trax:

 
Sound Trax main window (and pain in the neck, btw)

I made a couple of attempts recording, and the synchronization loss was so awful, I switched immediately to Cubase, where the recording, and specially the mixing, were a breeze. I don't want to know what my would have happened to my patience if I kept trying with Sound Trax.

I wanted to fix my Cubase screen shots (which had to be fractional), but I'm feeling lazy as of now, therefore I'll just put up the segments, because we all know I use a huge recording desk which no ordinary display can show as a whole.

Main Tracking window

 
Mixing Desk, plus some of the FX, and the Voice Channel Strip (showing how did I eq)

The rest of the FX view, including the two Dynamics processors and the Double Delay used for the "Magic Number"

Meantime, here's this little plaything, not without mentioning this recording is by no means to make profit, nor to take advantage of anyone or anything. It was meant to show my recording abilities, and as such I'm not claiming any ownership of any but my own effort and my voice. This recording is posted for recreational purposes.

May 22nd UPDATE - I felt the need to redo the mixing and here it is. Not really much else... I just happened to have a better time shifting via the software-based ADT (for a whopping 20 ms). well, ja ne... JJ

Joey.

Quiz time!

    Currently listening: Elliot Minor - Jessica    

I've been in a writer's block since my A/C went down, so I started surfing left and right so I can get my ideas going, but nothing has come up yet. Therefore, I found this girl's xanga (via a very unclear kind of surfing) where she posts some interesting quizzes. And if you haven't remembered, dear casual visitor, one of my favorite tricks is to shamelessly copy quizzes and post them in here. Actually, there has ben a lot since I posted one, I guess it's a fine time to insert yet one more. I got kind of freaked when it showed the final percentages, but as soon as I read the explanation on why I got such a result, well, it's kind of fair, anyway; but I don't think men are not caring and definitely men do think with their heart -sometimes.

So here's the "How girl-boy your brain is" quiz

My answers were (marked with an X):

Looking fashionable is important to you.
     True
     False X
You are better at:
     Explaining things you understand X
     Understanding what is being explained to you
Do you tend to remember your dreams? 
     Yes 
     No X
If you have a problem, you tend to 
     Solve it yourself 
     Ask for input X
In an argument or heated discussion, you find it most important to: 
     Come to an understanding X
     Drive your point home
Would you ever try an exciting new drug if it were illegal? 
     No - you prefer to obey the law X
     Depends on what it did
If someone you know is acting strange... 
     You try to read between the lines X
     You ask for an explanation
You tend to notice when someone has poor etiquette 
     True X
     False
If a friend who's gained weight asks you if she's gotten fat, you 
     Are completely honest 
     Would consider sparing her feelings X
When talking with your friends, you're more likely to discuss 
     Politics, sports, or news X
     What's going on in your lives and people you know
Even if you aren't one yourself, you can understand how some people can be vegetarians 
     False 
     True X
If a friend has a problem, it becomes your problem as well 
     False 
     True X
If you were to pick up a book for some relaxing reading, it would be: 
     Non fiction 
     Fiction X
You could marry for money... if the person was a billionaire. 
     True 
     False X
When it comes to old friends 
     You tend to lose touch with people fairly easily X
     You're good at keeping in touch

... And the results returned were:

Your Brain is 67% Female, 33% Male

Your brain leans female You think with your heart, not your head Sweet and considerate, you are a giver But you're tough enough not to let anyone take advantage of you!

Things doesn't make sense, sometimes.

Joey.

Victory!

    Currently listening: Seo Tai-Ji & Boys: 필승 必勝 (Pilseung - Victory)    

Finally, my new A/C has been installed. Oh, joy!. I can now rest without worrying about how hot is out there... instead, I now find myself worrying about how big my electricity bill will come. I should apply what Mrs. Vanderbilt song says: #What's the use of worrying?". The problem is, it hits on a certain soft spot (namely my monthly budget). Needless to say, now I have to re-organize my life around not overusing it.

Anyways, after a successful installation, now It's time to go back to what I was doing before the uncalled-for break.

That's right, fill up this space with (pseudo)poetry, (pseudo)music, and pseudo manga reviews.

The word as of today is: "let's continue, Shall we?".

Joey.